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Joke of the Day



jon357
23 Jan 2024  #91

Crikey.

Q. What do you call a joke that turns into a slanging match?
A. An off-topic PF thread...

Ironside
23 Jan 2024  #92

I never put your name

What name or which name or which moniker?
Are going full drama again over nothing? eh? Make it interesting this time.
----

Of course he wouldn't.

Hey, are you a duo? If so make it a comedy duo...
---

An off-topic PF thread...

You got it right!

Paulina
23 Jan 2024  #93

What do you call a joke

...that is sexually demeaning to two female PF members?

Crikey.

I thought that "some things are best ignored", jon357... So keep ignoring :) 🙄

Are going full drama again over nothing? eh?

What "full drama"? I thanked Milo for behaving like a decent guy and johnny_reb couldn't stop himself from commenting, of course.

jon357
23 Jan 2024  #94

I thought that "some things are best ignored

Calm down. It's a joke thread.

Certain posters try to offend me, including in this thread. It doesn't work.

It's a joke thread, not an argument.

Novichok
23 Jan 2024  #95

A gender-confused moron: Hey, doc, I want to beat the crap out of chicks in boxing as a woman. When can I have the surgery?

Doc: No need for a surgery. Just sign here...under "I am a woman" and you are good to go.

The moron: It's a miracle! You are better than Jesus!

Paulina
23 Jan 2024  #96

It's a joke thread.

Yeah, with some nasty jokes coming from you too.

Certain posters try to offend me, including in this thread. It doesn't work.

Good for you. But for me it's nice to see when a man reacts to a sexist behaviour, like Milo did. Such stuff matters to women and I'm going to applaud it whenever I see it.

It's a joke thread, not an argument.

Jokes can be damaging too. They're not always so innocent and "fun" like some a$$holes would like to portray them to be.

Besides, most of the jokes in this thread are crude and nasty, from what I've noticed, so I'm sure you can take some argument too. And if you can't then - ignore it :)

jon357
23 Jan 2024  #97

Yeah, with some nasty jokes coming from you too.

Get over that.

I'm going to applaud it whenever I see

You don't usually....

As I say, this is an off-topic joke thread in an obscure internet forum. Nobody is forced to participate, and in an off topic thread there's always going to be banter.

Chill out, it's late at night and not the time for slanging matches.

Novichok
23 Jan 2024  #98

Boys and girls...every good joke has a victim or it's neutered, tasteless, odorless woke Euro crap.

jon357
23 Jan 2024  #99

victim

Not all good jokes contain put downs.

Though many do.

Euro

For Brits, Irish, and to an extent Japanese, almost all nationalities' humour (especially American) just seems very basic and bland,

pawian
23 Jan 2024  #100

@Poloniusz How is your dick?

That question reminded me about an old joke I read in the USA:

Two guys, Johhny and Rich, are working in the fields. Johhny digs out a giant carrot from the ground.
Hmm, reminds me of my dik, he mutters under the nose.
Oh la la!! So big?? Rich enquires.
No, so dirty! Johhny replies.

hahahahaha buhahahahaha I can`t..... hohohohoho

Paulina
23 Jan 2024  #101

Get over that.

No :)

You don't usually....

How do you know?

As I say, this is an off-topic joke thread in an obscure internet forum. Nobody is forced to participate, and in an off topic thread there's always going to be banter.

1. I know it's an off-topic joke thread - you don't have to keep repeating that :))
2. I don't claim that anyone is forced to participate :)
3. What "banter"?

not the time for slanging matches.

But that's not for you to decide what's the right time for "slanging matches" :)

If it's too late for you then go to sleep :)))

jon357
23 Jan 2024  #102

Crumbs.

Too many questions, too boring a thread now.

There's always some that will attempt to start arguments, even in a joke thread.

Novichok
23 Jan 2024  #103

To be a successful comedienne in the US, one has to be - or pretend to be - a Jewish woman with a NY accent.

If you are a white Christian male and say what she just did, you are a goner...

Alternately, a black dude ...

Paulina
23 Jan 2024  #104

There's always some that will attempt to start arguments, even in a joke thread.

Ah, jon357, blaming the victims :) Johnny_reb started it here:

https://polishforums.com/off-topic/joke-day-88221/3/#msg1948713

He had it coming. That sickening a$$hole got what he deserved. So get over it and move on, jon357 :)

jon357
23 Jan 2024  #105

Johnny_reb started it here:

It started before that, didn't it though. Not that there are 'victims'... :-D

Time to stick to jokes in a joke thread. If it's not been killed already.

pawian
23 Jan 2024  #106

That question reminded me about an old joke I read in the USA:

Another one I remember from the USA.

Two guys, Johhny and Rich, are swimming in the ocean when a shark attacks and seriously mutilates Rich, biting his arms and legs off. Johhny tells Rich to climb onto his back and starts swimming back to the beach. When they reached it, Johhny, completely exhausted, falls on the sand.

Man, I am so fekked out!! he says.
Sorry, mate, it was the only way I could hold onto you! Rich apologises.

hahahahaha buhahahahaha I can`t hihihihiho ale kawał......

Paulina
23 Jan 2024  #107

It started before that, didn't it though... :-D

Meaning?

It was johnny_reb who started it in this thread.

If it's not been killed already.

Your "concern" is very touching, but I'm sure you realise that arguments happen often in Off Topic threads and usually die out on their own. And if they bother you so much, you can always... ignore them, instead of taking part in them :D

jon357
23 Jan 2024  #108

FFS, we're trying to rescue a joke thread, not bicker.

It was johnny_reb who started it in this thread

No...

Your "concern" is very touching

Double FFS.

Paulina
23 Jan 2024  #109

@jon357, calm down, it's just a joke thread on the internetz lol :D

No...

Yes. You know very well that he did and he knew what he was doing too.

jon357
23 Jan 2024  #110

It certainly was before you and Novichok appeared.

Yes

Oh no it isn't!

Lenka
23 Jan 2024  #111

It certainly was before you and Novichok appeared.

You may see it that way. To me it ended when names were inputted into a joke.

jon357
23 Jan 2024  #112

I very much do. To me, the damage started earlier. And every time someone tries to revive the thread, it quickly goes awry.

And of course analysing jokes instantly kills them.

Lenka
23 Jan 2024  #113

of course analysing jokes instantly kills them.

There is no analysing needed when someone puts a name in it

Not that the jokes were very funny to begin with.

jon357
23 Jan 2024  #114

You may well think that, and others may disagree.

Not that the jokes were very funny to begin with

Some ar quite good, though as I say, analysis kills humour.

Paulina
23 Jan 2024  #115

@jon357, I wouldn't appear in this thread if johnny_reb didn't use my and Lenka's name in that sexual joke. It was disrespectful and I had the right to react, so why are you gaslighting me? It somehow didn't bother you that Milo criticised that joke. So why are you butting in and prolonging this?

Oh no it isn't!

Clearly not for you. And that's the sad part from my perspective.

To me it ended when names were inputted into a joke.

Yes, exactly.

And of course analysing jokes instantly kills them.

It's not about "analysing" jokes. It's about putting my and Lenka's names into a sexual joke.

jon357
23 Jan 2024  #116

It's not

Oh yes it is,

Look behind you.

Paulina
23 Jan 2024  #117

@jon357, sorry, but I don't get it.

pawian
23 Jan 2024  #118

Johhny comes to a doctor with a frog on his head.
What`s the matter?? the doctor asks.
Sth got stuck to my ass! The frog replies.

hahahahaha buhahahaha I can`t..... ale kawał.

Paulina
23 Jan 2024  #119

@pawian, those are all great, but I think johnny_reb will relate to this one better lol:

Johnny_reb and his wife walk into a urologist's office.
The wife says, "Doc, my husband suffers from erectile dysfunction."
Johnny_reb interjects, "Well, technically it's her who suffers from it."

Paulina
23 Jan 2024  #120

FFS, we're trying to rescue a joke thread

Poor, impotent johnny_reb becomes so desperate that he robs a sperm bank and the judge tells him he has to replace what he's stolen, or else he'll go to jail. Thinking he's doomed, the man turns to his lawyer, jon357.

"Don't worry," says jon357, "I'm sure I can get you off."

:D

:)


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