That's why I became addicted to crime shows as proof that I am correct
Oh boy... I'm addicted not so much to crime shows, but recordings of interrogations and depositions. I don't care so much about the crime, as the criminal. What makes him tick? How does he see himself? Watching the cops in interrogation, is also educative.
These people for all intents and purposes live in a different world to everyone else. Cops, I mean. After watching many hundreds of hours of these interrogations, I've come to the conclusion that cops are as close to the criminals as they are to civilians. Some relatives that worked in law enforcement confirmed this for me.
"If you've been surveil-lancing a suspect for some weeks, listening to his phone conversations, reading his correspondence - and then suddenly one day he gets whacked - of course you get upset."
This sort of sentiment, above, is what I've heard from family and seen in videos. Also, often cops begin talking about the honor they observe among criminals. Initially it shocked me, but then it started to make sense to me. Though they have different roles, their life is in many aspects guided by the same principles. Fraternity, honor, a complete separation from the rest of society, and of course a die hard adherence to machismo.
Once I realized that cops view civilians with pretty much equal disgust to what they feel for criminals, I've stopped romanticizing them so much, and shifted my focus to intelligence agents as models of virtue.
Then I started understanding more about intelligence agents, and came away even more dispirited. Those guys believe themselves as some kind of agents of god on earth. If a cop looks at a civilian as a burden and a liability, then an intelligence agent sees basically an insect.
Finally, things came full circle and I became comfortable in my own skin as a businessperson. I don't arrest anyone, don't spy on anyone, don't make anyone's life harder through passing stupid laws. That's enough for me.
Edit: Naturally I also disavow crime :)