Random Chat 4

this is sort of sad but interesting:
youtube.com/watch?v=1eMNcG5beJY

btw Johnny renumber when you claimed that those oldie guys in Warsaw who go to meetups to score with young slavic babes are like me except they go for older I never had a chance to respond to the tbull-sht statement of urs because its a lie.y ou and I know well if a 17 yr old showed up to one of those meetings they'd be on her like butter on bread. secondly, the ones I tend to go for are over the age of consent and physically just as developed as those 19/20 yr olds those oldie at those Warsaw meets for and again im a man in my prime late 30s not a fuking oldie Johnny. firkin Johnny boi.

why is it all chicks on fotka.pl get blocked like literally the site blocks all chicks who either sell nudes or meet for sex on this site. is there a faking legitimate site you can fuk teens in Poland? or is Poland that backwards and anti sex workers like some medieval sh-thole it is?

I bought a $0.99 Kindle copy of Tocqueville's Democracy in America, so I could copy-paste some entries relevant to the thread. Hope Vincent won't mind, since I'm actually paying to quote here:

As social conditions become more equal, the number of persons increases who, although they are neither rich enough nor powerful enough to exercise any great influence over their fellow-creatures, have nevertheless acquired or retained sufficient education and fortune to satisfy their own wants. They owe nothing to any man, they expect nothing from any man; they acquire the habit of always considering themselves as standing alone, and they are apt to imagine that their whole destiny is in their own hands. Thus not only does democracy make every man forget his ancestors, but it hides his descendants, and separates his contemporaries from him; it throws him back forever upon himself alone, and threatens in the end to confine him entirely within the solitude of his own heart.

I hate you Strelecz, you fu*king scum.

I advise you to plan a touristic trip to Chechnya, and to try your hand at the local dating scene.

As Putin once said, "there they will give you a circumcision in such fashion, that nothing will ever grow back again. We have such specialists."

Hmm, while I'm sure part of it is noble and pure love I would say majority comes from not being able to run the household and organise their lives, including finding a new role for themselves.

@Lenka

There's some truth in this. Women seem to do much better in the aftermath of a husband passing. Sometimes, even enjoying a whole second act.

...democracy or affluence. Three or four generations in one house on Walton Mountain is no longer popular or doable. In that model, everybody had an active role and felt good about it.

Today, grandparents are just occasional babysitters. If they have any brains, they will not share their wisdom with their adult children. Or when they realize that their favorite 3rd grader - typically a girl - knows much more than they ever did. Later, once the youngest one is older than 9, they see them three times a year. No more sleepovers.

The generational gap drives a big wedge because the parents are too fu*cking stupid to see the beauty of gay rainbows, open borders, men modeling bras, and other progressive things that make them wonder where their country went wrong and why the only subject that is safe to discuss is food and how wonderful the grandkids are.


Women are much better at it before their husbands' passing. Men just don't talk other than when they need to borrow a tool.

They usually have no other choice than to cope because, first of all, they were usually younger and women live longer. So, on average, they have about 10 years of further life with which they have to do something. They do better because they subconsciously plan ahead. Men, on the other hand, are usually totally surprised because the death of a wife is usually premature and unplanned.

Maybe through lack of living space, but this is still relatively common in Russia. Specifically - it is still popular among Russians. Among the various asiatic people that live in Russia, and along our borders it is the absolute norm.

You'll get not a small amount of judgement (even from friends), if you don't visit your parents at least once every week or so. The assumption would be that something is deeply wrong in your family relations. It may not be so much judgement, as pity. Definitely less the case in Moscow and St. Petersburg, if compared to the regions.

Grandparents as "babysitters", is perhaps too popular. I barely saw my parents until I was 16. Honestly - I wasn't super happy about it, but now I wouldn't trade it for the world. The experience also made me hate my parents a little bit, but things have normalized since then. Parents are more like "friends", while grandparents are the actual parents.

Gosh Novi, you paint a very bleak picture. You sound a bit depressed. Wish I had some words of comfort but invariably one ends up sounding patronizing. You were talking about going to a men's prayer group - do you still have faith then? Would you consider attending a meeting of the Society of Friends (the Quakers)? They are very gentle and it's a nice support group without too much yakkity yak. As for not having friends, you have us! I'll say a prayer for you anyway. Somebody cares.

True enough. At 33, I'm very happy to have an 80 year old Novi to talk to.

More than friends. PFers are a family - a weird, disturbed and dysfunctional one but still.

+1

We've had a lot of weirdos, maniacs and haters here but of the kind that one could tolerate; this guy - on the other hand - is just a piece of steaming sh*t.

It's more than that. Women cooperate. Men compete. You can see this trait playing out even here.

As much as I like arguing to keep my adrenaline flowing, I envy women in this respect.
That is why at neighborhood parties I would always choose women. When they would talk about life or just gossip, men would just stand there hollering at the screen.

I am still not sure if they really care or just try to escape.


I appreciate your kind words but then who the hell am I going to argue with?

@GefreiterKania

Kania, is it the same in Poland as in Russia - vis-a-vis parents?

... or are you becoming more like the rest of the hated West, where each is an island - adrift at sea?

Loneliness is a social plague - or as they call it "a construct" - even among teens. That smartphone and the hundreds of "friends" is very alluring but it still can't give you a hug. Maybe one day...

I was fortunate not to have one. Today, it's for maps and pics. To call I have my flip phone. Smartphones are too complicated to operate when they ring.

Probably.

Most granmas and granpas are happy to be free babysitters for their grandchildren and parents very often support their children financially (and then 15-20 years later the roles reverse). And don't even get me started on Polish moms; my mother used to come to my rented flat when I was at uni to change my bed linen because she was absolutely convinced that I wouldn't do it properly on my own. Also, if you're a teenager/student and you visit your grandma, she will feed you up to bursting point and give you a wad of stashed away banknotes. :D

The love for their grandchildren coupled with dementia causes thousands of scumbags to con pensioners out of their money with the infamous na wnuczka method every year. So, all in all, in this respect we're still pretty Slavic.

@Bobko
I was unfortunate enough to have my parents split before I became a teenager. Closest family I could possibly visit on my own due to financial limitations at a young age was my aunt, who behaved in a bad way towards my mother. Too often and made me wash her staircase while I was sick and I'll while visiting them.

I would personally never ask any of my own guests to wash my own staircase, let alone ask closest family to do such a thing. As I wouldn't want to humiliate having them to do it, but also by showing that I hadn't been able to wash it before hand. Felt very much like Harry Potter when he lived with his Aunt and Uncle, which also irritated me that she never understood that either and blamed everything on her sister.

So relations were never really good, to her bewilderment.

While family from the other side were always abroad and only able to visit by flight trips. It made me get used to basically never visit them much on my own, nor how they wanted it done and never told me really what they expect of me, receiving a lot of mixed messages too often.

So I just don't visit, especially when I got my bank cards and loans to pay. They always seem to get the impression I personally have a lot of money, but that's cause they look at my clothes etc and gadgets which I get as gifts before I am able to consider buying them from my sister or mother, cause they love me very much and would do almost anything for me. It created a dependency problem for me, a very long time and created a skewed image of me cause of it.

I tried my best becoming as independent as possible by joining the army and not having to rely on my family in any sense as for them to get more breathing room.

But, after the army shrink decided I was unfit for the army. Despite my seargent saying it would be a sin to deny me becoming a soldier after seeing me the whole training, he being a hardcore soldier, gym nut and everything convinced me that I am meant for the army.

But, after the shrink denied me to become a professional soldier. Even when performing fine and good in all earlier tests and even swearing an oath, I felt betrayed and abandoned yet again, like a reoccurring tragedy in my life.

I have very few good words to say about any psychologist cause of that, she stole not only my dream, my future, but also a chance to redeem myself, the family and serve my country I was extremely grateful for including and accepting me for who I am.

So yeah, I get it regarding family

I'm embarrassed to say that every visit from my mother to NYC begins by her launching the washer/dryer. Even now. Then she throws out everything from my fridge. Later, quietly, she throws out every pack of cigarettes and hides my whisky.

While she is doing this, my father opens hundreds of pieces of mail. Crucifying me for every unpaid parking ticket and medical bill.


Very popular in the United States.

@ GefreiterKania

My family must be pretty anusual then. After moving out the kids are understood to be adults capable managing their finances and households. Only yonne did my mom clean my brothers room at uni when she visited unexpected and he wasn't there. Other than that he was free to sleep in dirty linen if he wanted to. My parents were also too far and still working to be babysitting

They are taking literally everyone these days, Gruni. Błaszczak is obsessed with his 300,000 army aim, so they even put army's civilian workers (office workers, cooks) into uniforms now. If they rejected you because of psychological tests then they must have had a genuine reason. Did they give you any advice about the therapy to be implemented or just told you to f*ck off (that would be typical for army doctors)?

@Bobko

Sounds like our moms are very similar :) My dad is a bit more relaxed than yours - he totally spoiled me.


Heartless statement.

Hey, Alien, do you realize what you did by starting this thread?
Soon, we all will be friends here...Even Cargo...

@GefreiterKania
They thought me to be unfit (emotionally unstable most likely, which I proved to be wrong by being very calm about it. Despite reacting emotionally with my body, it was very important for me and wanted a military career. Basically my life was at stake)

And told me to try maybe in a year (which I took as an attempt to comfort me by being motherly, but I didn't need any comfort. Just work and a life)

I guess they would thank God if I applied now I guess

Bro, I'm sorry.


Not good. Army is made for people like you. I was not normal military, but in a more office capacity, but it still played a huge role in introducing some structure and purpose to my life - which was very much unanchored before.

I understand what you are saying.

Not heartless. If anyone needed help he/she would ask for it. If parents were capable then they did. And kids treated it as a loan.

My parents had two small kids when my older brothers were becoming independent and that was their focus.

As to visits with family - if it was staying for longer kids were treated as family and as such had their little jobs. Help with washing, take bin out etc. No-one had to push it, it was understood

@Lenka

I would say such a protestant approach is still quite unusual in Poland. But, inevitably, as new generations are born and raised in capitalism, they will most likely adopt similar approach to work, money, family etc.

Truly a Skynet/Borg-style approach. I got chills reading Lenka's post. Do people really treat each other in this way?

What way?

Do you expect your parents to send you money every month?

We have very supportive family. If I were in troubles I could count on my parents and siblings and I would never be homeless or hungry.

I'm just joking. I never lived in Poland, and don't know what is normal.

As mentioned, in America everyone is absolutely miserable. Kania gave me heart, when he said Poles are still more like us, than them. Then you made me worry, that maybe the spark of the home fire is dying in Poland.

It is to some extent as people move away etc. Grandparent are still working or too old too look after grandkids. Or they simply try to have their own life with friends, meetings etc.

Parents take more responsibility for raising their kids. Parenting is much more intense. People raised like you(what you described that is) are trying to do things differently and spend time with their kids.

But also people are more open about saying 'hey, actually I don't like this/ that' when it comes to family.

Saying that I will go back home twice in a space of month this year- once for my holidays and once just for few days as my mom has big B-day and people from differentparts of Poland and from abroad are coming. Can't wait.