You are making many generalizations & assumptions here.
There is no other way to set policy than by making generalizations and assumptions.... no wait there is! You can just run off your mouth like Merkel and nothing bad could possibly happen.
My iron rule of immigration is that immigrants tend to act in their new country the same way they acted before they got there. So, it's a good idea for politicians to pay attention to that so that they know what they're getting their countries into.
If your children are at risk, wouldn't you break "borders laws"?
One or two, yes. Would I keep entering country after country after I'm safe and away from the conflict? I like to think that I have more respect for the law than that.
A lot of these people are running away from camps. They don't want camps. They want a chance at a normal life where their children can go to school and grow up like normal children.
And there's no country between Syria (ruined by Syrians, I note) and benefits-rich Germany that they can do that? I'm sure that the people of Turkey, Greece, Macedonia, Hungary, Serbia, Croatia, Slovenia and Austria are flattered.....
A big problem is that the "help the refugees!" people don't see them as real human beings with their own interests and own goals. I do. And I'm betting those interests and goals don't align very well with traditional Western European values like separation of church and state and legal equality between the sexes and civic rather than purely family based morality.